Ugh. Just in case any of my regular readers are wondering, all is going well. Or at least, it is at my end. But I have this awful habit of listening to people's problems and wanting/trying to help. Yeah, that SOUNDS all fine n dandy, but I am absolutely powerless, yet I feel their pain and there is nothing I can do. Yes, I'm being vague. So sue me. Fuck you all!

 Dammit! I could just... hit something. But that would hurt. I think I'm gonna cut back on eating again. Yeah yeah, it's my stupid way of punishing the world by punishing myself. There are worse self-destructive habits to have. Like attacking my nails and face... wait, I do that too... oh well, at least I don't do anything permanent or harmful to others. Dammit why do I have to be so... ARGH!

I love him and I need him but I really don't know how to deal with his family situation. Don't ask cuz I don't know enough to explain. I can't explain. I never can. Why is it that I never find the words to say, I never have the explanation, the answer to the inevitable "why"?

I AM SO FUCKING POWERLESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and i can't see the end because it doesn't depend on me. it doesn't involve me and all i can do is be here and rant and... fucking hell now i'm crying.

I'll just end this rant before I break something. My keyboard is getting quite a hammering.


Don't worry about me. Let me do all the worrying. I always do. Yall just ignore my strange mood.

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