Yeah, yeah, crappy weirdo title, I know.

Well, I just wanted to bare my musings to y'all (omfg I've never used that word before. y'all. that's so REDNECK)...

You think you have trouble understanding me? Think of the trouble I have understanding me! But there are some things I've figured out, and here they are:

-I do not actually believe that I am fat, even when I say so. I just like hearing people say I'm not. I'm pudgy, yes, but nothing more. Though I am still very sensitive about my weight I shudder to think of what I was before... (yes, if you must know, I WAS 165 lbs. That is so frickin sad and disgusting. No wonder I was depressed!)

-I do not actually hear voices. I just invented them and they kinda took off.

-I am aware that Lathius is not real. He is a character, a figment of my overactive imagination fabricated while I brainwashed myself into thinking that no one was worthy of my veined beating organ. Tho I guess I've found someone worthy of said heart... lol

-I know that I quote inside jokes to people who don't get them. Big deal, it's still funny to me!

-I know I would be terrifying if I were to be drunk or high. Hyper gets scary enough.

-I forgot that I was gifted and it was better that way. Just let me be normal and I'll approach things my own way and somehow get to a similar conclusion. I just take a different angle.

-Different is better even if it's harder (which it is, tho I am probably contradicting my previous point).

-I am actually really bad at playing the flute. I just play by ear off of the better flute players. Seriously. Now Pirates of the Caribbean, on the other hand, I knew that tune WAAAAAY before the others cuz I was already obsessed with the soundtrack. lol.

-Actually, screw that, I have to be pretty good to keep up with the big guns this long. I think I'll take Music next year too, and hope I'm with Jacki and/or Andrea. Preferably Jacki, cuz I  hate Andrea for being better than me at almost anything. All I have on her is my writing.

-I know other people can write too. But when the stars are aligned I can churn out a witty piece and win money. Hardly anyone else enters stuff, so more $$$ for me!

-I am a chronic worrier. I will always find something to worry about, be it my dog destroying the blinds, other people's problems or just that even my friends don't really understand me that well. Tho there are some times that they know me better than I do...

-I am a slave to the clock. I am time's b*tch.

-I love and hate myself, just as I love and hate the Ring...


And I can't think of anything else retarded to say, so I'll just sign off now.

P.S. Aren't these awesome? I found them at Mint Tea.



I'm no fan of anime, but these are neat.

I'm impressed by your ability to be so insightful about yourself. It's a rare quality. Hope you have a great holiday!

You make me laugh...but i'm not laughing at you. Your journal is so candid, that it's actually amusing to read.

God BLESS. I hope you have a wonderful 2006.